Well Meaning Relatives!

[tmcdonal]

I had an incident early into my tech diving (not cave) - Huge entanglement in fishing line at depth and visibility went to zero. Took a long time to cut free and I ended up with more deco obligation than I had gas. Ended up blowing 20 minutes of deco and spent the night watching for the slightest indication of DCS - I was extremely lucky in that regard.

I shared the details of this with everyone, diver or not, as just a gripping story. A week later I received a letter from my sister who lives in the same city (never received one before), expressing her concerns about my diving and suggesting I consider a different hobby. It was very thoughtful, well written, and intentioned.

I called her and talked to her about the risks/rewards, but stressed that the whole purpose of training was learning how to deal with contingencies and the "what-ifs". I also stressed what would have happened had I not had training and panicked. I assured her that this was a slow progression with training and experience along the way. Unfortunately, some of the best experience is learned through bad experiences, but the training is what keeps me alive to continue learning. That satisfied her

Fast forward ten years later and I'm now married. When people have questioned my wife about my "insane" diving interests, she has repeatedly defended me by talking about the training and feeling confident that I won't go beyond the limits of my training - with one caveat - She doesn't have any problem with me making solo open water dives, no matter how deep or even into wrecks. However, she made me promise that I wouldn't do any solo cave dives. I'm so early in my cave diving that it's not even something that crosses my mind - yet!

For others, I would stress that almost all training revolves around how to deal with contingencies and what lessons are learned from other incidents/accidents. I appreciate the sarcastic ways of replying. However, a mature, well-reasoned, response will do more good toward showing you take safety seriously.

-Tom

[Scubastud16]

They're not keeping you from continuing, they're just delaying it. Don't worry about it, just PERFECT your cavern skills so that when you're on your own you'll be a better cave diver.

I was in my late thirties before I began cave diving. Don't rush things. The caves will be there for a long time. And there's a LOT of cavern to be seen.

Fortunately, I'm not all that worried about it. I have a lot of cavern to see, I still have a little bit of gear to collect (doubles + DS), and I have plenty of buddies to make the best diver I can be before I enter cave training.

Oh, and when we all go OW diving (they are certified, along with my brother)...they pay...so I keep my mouth shut!

[sskasser]

After blowing off 20 minutes of deco, "watching for the slightest indication of DCS" took place under medical supervision, I hope.

[JahJahwarrior]

My parents do not approve of my diving but I have managed to keep from being disowned. Mostly, I don't ever talk about diving and that keeps it out of sight, out of mind. I paid for every class after ow and all of the gear with my own money.

[scblade27]

Thats weird...when I told my parents about getting into cave diving and the importance of all the different kinds of gear, I found small holes poked in my canister light and the batteries removed from my backups

[tmcdonal]

After blowing off 20 minutes of deco, "watching for the slightest indication of DCS" took place under medical supervision, I hope.

That would be a negative. Don't try this at home.

[skip]

My family too is concerned with my cave diving. And they know it's tennessee cold black holes, not the nice gin-clear water of florida caves (they've seen the pictures). At my age (not 20's), my mother has learned to hug me and hold on a little longer and even manage a smile. my wife of 9 years, has often said that if i go on to such and such, that's when she'll put her foot down. of course i go on to such and such and her foot stays up.

But I can see it in their eyes when I say "I'm going cave diving, be back in a couple of hours...," or "I'm cave diving, see you next week," (florida trip). They worry.

My general life-long strategy and answer has been, "if there's no chance of dying, then there's no point in going." A bit flippant, a bit of a lie, but too many people live a life that is so boring, so contained, so full of dread of death, that I can't imagine they are living at all. I don't want to die in a cave (or anywhere else either), but dang, if you got to go, it's better than a heart attack in front of a tv, or driving down the road, or while asleep in bed.

My wife tells me every so often, "have a good time, but if you die, I'm burying you in a suit and tie." She knows I hate suits and ties, and that small threat is her way of convincing herself it won't happen today.


-skip

[FW]

Y'all must have the wrong families! When I got into OW diving, and started showing my family the pictures, my Father went out and took an OW class. I have 2 brothers and a sister that did the same. I even took my sister to Mexico, and let her do some of the "Cave-ern" diving they call OW.

[DogDiver]

Nice thought provoking thread. Two of my kids are cave trained. One is Full Cave, the other is Intro. I have made it a practice not to have all three of us in a cave at a time. It would be hard enough for my wife Jayne if two of us died, but if all three of us perrished...well I hate to think of it for her and the third child that is only interested in diving warm water pretty fishes. Training, Training, Training, and accepting the risks that go with it. But most importantly, reducing those risks to an acceptable level. When ever I think of pushing thirds, just to see whats around the next bend....I think of my family and what if...... Ken

[Sludge]

My mother is 77, an open water diver since 1987. She always says if it weren't for the weight of the gear she'd cave dive.

She loves to see pictures and videos of cave diving. She manages to ride along with me on a day trip at least once a year. A dive she made in Orange Grove Sink was the only fresh water dive she's ever made (against ~250 salt water dives).

She also loves meeting cave divers. She attended the NSS-CDS Social at Jackson Blue in October 2007.