I’m a cavern diver working towards full with about 50 dives in my cave gear (400+ total) that includes double 104’s and in the midst of the intro portion of my training.

I was diving with my instructor and a buddy. The first dive was a good one, we did a lights out air share on the exit where I was the leader and the ooa diver…it went well, at one part the gold line was wrapped around a large rock and right against the line it was vertically challenging but I backed up and felt around and made it through fine on the right.

On the second dive everything was going well with my buddy in the lead…he was now the ooa diver and I gave him my primary and he got himself moved around in front for the exit and we went lights out, the gold line was on the left and he failed to hold my long hose in his left hand along with the line so that he was right on the line and at some points on top of it.

This made it difficult for me as there wasn’t room to get to his arm or knee in proper touch contact and I was swimming with my face in his fins. We got to the point where I had got caught before and I was again so close to the line that I couldn’t get through. I tried a number of times to move forward.

At that point my regulator started to breathe like it does when the air is off. I took in about half a lung full and was ooa for real. I laid there in the dark for a moment stunned thinking this can’t be and then started fumbling for my necklaced backup regulator forgetting the situation (it was already in my mouth and dead).

After seconds at that, I regressed again, spit out my secondary and looked for my clipped primary (it was in my buddies mouth). Now I was getting that must breathe feeling and thought to get help…signal, but I was in the midst of a lights out air share drill.

At that point I noted some ambient light as my instructor had let his light shine to check the situation and I slashed my throat. I had not completed one slash and his regulator was in my face. I stuffed it in my mouth and began gulping hydrox (an air and water mix that I usually try to avoid).

After breathing my fill and calming myself. I had my primary handed back to me by my instructor and we exited the cave. I was a bit out of it as the thought that this wasn’t a good way to die had entered my mind. I have been over this event many times in my mind since it happened; frankly it’s the only thing that I thought about for days after. What should I have done. Well right away, I should have realized that I rolled off my left post since I was breathing my secondary.

In class, I had been told that you put your long hose on the right post to avoid rolling it off and then immediately dismissed roll off as a risk because I had a configuration that reduces that risk. So next time I will immediately check the valve from which the regulator I’m breathing is attached. This incident was compounded by lights out…I should have gone immediately to lights on either my primary or a backup light…I was not alone and should have signaled my situation asap. Lastly, as the drowning process progressed I probably would have jerked my long hose regulator back from my buddy and I was within seconds of having to do that but I had not yet thought of it at the time I was offered my instructor’s source.

I will never dive in a cave without instant access to my valves. I am also appreciative of the watchful eye of my instructor and the incident has made me think of the level at which the instructor teaches and the risks that are present as you push novices to the edge in a lights out environment. He was there when needed and had the situation under control quickly.

I had just successfully done the airshare on the dive before and the roll off happened to me at a point when my task loading was high and when I was uncomfortable with my face in a less than up to speed buddies fins. I certainly wasted precious seconds searching for first another second and second for a clipped primary. I can not fathom why i regressed in my response to the situation. The main lessons out of this for me was that this is a sport in which you can die if you are not at your best and training does belong where it is, at the top of the factors list; and when you feel a post being breathed down, go for your valves. At this point in my training I had not yet become competent (through practice)in the valve shutdown/startup drill and I now think that skill should be very early in training as roll offs do happen.

My instructor commended me for not panicking and then proceeded to chastise me for not going to my valve. He said that he doubted if I would forget the lesson and he is most correct. The entry of a death thought certainly drives the point home and then some. When your air quits you only have seconds to act and resolve the situation...my usual mantra that i used for years "stop, breathe, think, act" doesn't work well when the breathe part is missing.